The Human Connection

What a weekend. I spent yesterday working at a to-be-unnamed farm in the southern part of this lovely state. It is an interesting place, owned by a person who I am not a huge fan of. He treats people like property and I am definitely not okay with that. I had never officially met him before yesterday, but I'd heard a lot about him from two people who work there a lot more than I do. He really is a first class A-Hole. Bad enough to merit capitalization. 

When I first met him he didn't really speak to me... it turns out that's because he thought I was 17 or so. When he found out that I had mad experience in the gardening department and was almost 27 however, he couldn't talk to me enough. It was the kind of sickly sweet talk that makes the bile rise in the back of your throat. It was definitely a challenge for me to not tell him off before I left there yesterday, even though he offered me a full-time summer job there if I only lived closer... There would certainly be benefits, but he is one gigantic negative. 

He is one of those people who will never have a genuine connection with other people. A very dear friend of mine who has to deal with him on a daily basis has made the observation and prediction that his punishment for treating people the way he does is that he will die alone and no one will mourn him. I completely agree and see no reason anyone would be sad to see him go. 

On the topic of connections however, it is really amazing to me how certain people just have those connections. There are synapses that fire between two brains and forge a bond that lasts for years and years over insane distances with very little actual communication. One of those situations where all you have to do is think about the other person and it keeps the relationship alive. Not everyone is lucky enough to have that privilege and it certainly is a privilege. For the longest time, I thought it was just me and my imagination, but it turns out that is just not the way. Maybe my psychic powers are as strong as the Band teacher at school told me they are. Pretty neat, huh? 

3,652 days

give or take 

for leap year accuracy.

I have stewed

and thought

and wondered - 

doubting myself all along the way

only to discover

I should have pushed away

the doubt

and gone with 

my gut. 

Quickie

Just a quickie tonight. I've worked all day, been very patient when I really didn't want to be (adult related, not kiddo), taken myself out to dinner surrounded by drunk old people, and grocery shopped. I've put away the groceries, packed for the weekend and figured out my schedule. I'm off and running and I'll be back on Sunday.  

A very happy birthday to my peanut JT in the picture above. Ten years ago tonight I was able to watch him come into this world and it was truly a miracle. 

Have fun all!!

The Definition of, "Sick as a Dog."

My baby Dexter dog was up sick A LOT last night. Something got his tummy rumbling and he still isn't feeling 110%. He gets so sad when he's sick. It's pretty much awful. It's like he feels guilty for waking me up to take him out, but he doesn't have much choice. Honestly I'd rather he wake me up than just go for it on the bedroom floor. It does leave me a little on the sleepy side however. 

It was a pretty good day at school today. The kids were in good form... since it's Middle School there's always a ton of drama, but I'm used to it at this point. I really love my job. It gives me a chance to have real, meaningful interactions with kids and that is ridiculously rewarding. There are a lot of good kids who need someone to listen and I am more than willing. It's funny too, because they seem to know that and I hear from them a lot. I am more than happy to listen. I seem to be pretty good at it. 

I had a chance to see my friend Jess this afternoon, which pretty much rocked my socks. I adore her and am looking forward to when things calm down a little for her so we can hang out for real. I also got to have some sweet chai tea this afternoon with my other friend Krystle. We had a nice time and commiserated about how the time flew by while we were together. Before I knew it, I looked at my watch and it was 5:50 and she had to be home by 6:00. It's wild what happens when you're having good conversation!

I also wrote multiple new poems today! I think between this blog and other events my creative juices are officially flowing. I'm liking it. A lot. I might even post more than one here today... and that being said, let's get down to it!

1

Rain falls

continuously.

It washes the world

clean 

of the pollen

that's been gagging up

the air

and my throat

for days. 

Some people

don't like the rain - 

I say, 

bring

it 

on. 

2

Enthralled

by ink.

On paper,

in skin.

Spilled across a page 

like blood

splattered from a wound

too shallow to penetrate

through these imaginary bonds

we've created.

I write to discover - 

who I am,

how I feel. 

If only I could write

all

day

long. 

3

I wish I were better

at waiting.

Better at breathing

deep

and waiting for the

inevitable.

Lately I feel the need

to rush out

take everything on

at once. 

I must be making up

for lost time. 

Rainy Day Woman

I really love rainy days. There are so many different kinds of rainy days... warm rainy days when you can go outside and walk in the rain and play in puddles, spring rainy days when you can watch the rain melting the snow away, summer rainy days that cut through the heat and make it bearable, and rainy days like today, where you just want to snuggle up on the couch with some warm puppies and read a good book. 

I spent the majority of the day freezing my derriere off  in my classroom. I did not wear enough layers for this kind of rain. The kids were good though and one of my classes shared picture books that they wrote. They did an awesome job with them for the most part! One even almost made me cry. When a little fishy dies in an oil spill, it just really gets to me I guess. The kids made fun of me, but it's all good. I'm sensitive, what can I say?

Today is my little Lucy's birthday. She is one!! And super cute. She slept almost all night last night as well, which makes me so happy. She snuggled up against my hip and was out like a light. She's a little snuggle bunny and I love it. 

Well, I'm off to have an after-school snack and relax for a while. How about a little poem to finish up the post? 

As Of Yet Untitled

Inextricably connected

over years that have passed

with barely a glance.

Time and time again

brought together - 

inexplicably - 

but it always feels just right.

I have a notion

that you

were meant to be my always. 

Don't Lick Sharp Knives.

It is always nice to go back to school on a Tuesday instead of a Monday. It's really no different, but you can make it feel different because there are only three more days after Tuesday as opposed to Monday when you still have four to contend with. I am sure it is completely in my head, but it feels better and right now, that's all that matters to me!

Today is a very special day to me. As I believe I have mentioned multiple times, my animals are my babies and my life and today is one of my horse's birthdays. Ms. Revlon Red is 16 years old today! I have to say, as I always do when I introduce her to people, I did NOT name her. I do have to say though, her name suits her to a T. She is prissy and princessy and is in charge whether you like it or not. I spoiled her rotten when she was a baby and so I claim complete responsibility for her actions. I love her to the moon and back though. She is certainly like my other half and she knows as soon as she sees me what kind of mood I'm in. She isn't the type though to coddle me if I am in a bad mood. Instead, she gets pissy with me right back until I snap out of it. She's good like that. It is hard to believe that she is 16 and that I've had her for 14 years. That, my friend, is a long term relationship. 

I am pretty psyched about all of the music that my lovely cousin Julie shared with me last night. She came over and we set up a little network between our Macs and went to town. I took 514 songs from her computer... and they all rock my socks. I stole all of the Reel Big Fish she had in preparation for their concert in July. I absolutely cannot wait for that. I love music so much. The lyrics get me every time. It is poetry set to music and I can't get enough. It was rather scary in fact because as I was looking at all of the titles, I could sing parts of tons of the songs. I wonder what else I could be using that space in my brain to store? 

I'm feeling very thankful right now for my friends. It has been a long time since I've had such a strong support system behind me of people who aren't related to me by blood. It is an amazing feeling to develop a bond with someone who you have so much in common with and you know you can count on. I have a feeling you know who you are. We have that give and take thing down and I certainly try to come at you with my best, but I know if I'm at my worst, you'll be there for me too. I'll be loving you.

Well, it's time for me to go play with ponies, so here's the daily dose of Casey poetry. I'm throwing it off the top of my head, so bear with me. 

You

The phone rings,

and when it's 

you

I can answer

without anxiety. 

We can talk about

anything

and 

everything

and 

you even understand

my pet-centered 

semi-crazy

life. 

I 

am so lucky

to have 

you

as a part of my life. 

A Long Weekend

The saying "long weekend" can be taken in a few different ways... it could mean that you have an extra day off from work to enjoy your freedom, or it could mean that the weekend passed like molasses running up a hill in January. My weekend doesn't fit either description. It went by really fast, but I only had one day off. I love working at Bearcamp Garden, but it does make things a little crazy on the homefront. So much to do, so much laundry, so much dog walking and only so little time. 

It was a good weekend and I'm sad to see it go. I'm not quite ready to go back to school tomorrow. There are many more things I would like to get accomplished in my own life, but those will have to wait for next weekend. 

I am off now to feed my puppies and take them out, and then go celebrate my grandfather's birthday. It's a birthday filled week this week. Today is my grandfather's, tomorrow is Revlon's, Wednesday is Lucy's, Thursday is my sister-in-law's and Friday is JT's who I might add was named after my grandfather - James Theodore. 

Remember to cover up and close your windows tonight. There's a good chance of frost! Yuck!

An owl calls

in the distance. 

She echoes the question

lodged in my heart.

"Who? Who?"

"Who? Who?"

Though I know

not to get too far ahead

of myself

I can't stop

my thoughts.

They are farther ranging

than migratory butterflies,

and I worry

that like the monarchs,

they'll reach their destination

only to die

in paradise

and never return

from whence they came. 

Sunday, sunday...

Well first off, I'd like to say that I'm super psyched that Jess and Al have their living situation all figured out. They are two of my favorite people and I've been stressed that they've been stressed about finding a place to live with their two adorable puppy dogs. Two adorable dogs and two adorable people... how could you not want them to live in your house??

Today has been a gorgeous and productive day. It was showery this morning and I had a lovely breakfast and shopping excursion with my sister-in-law Kate. It was super fun and I got some springy T-shirts and the like, so now I am all set for the warmer weather that has finally arrived. I got home and took Dexter and Lucy for a fantastic walk, all the way to the top of the hill (they're both napping now!), and I've dug through boxes to find my summer clothes and summer shoes. Now I'm down to finishing up with laundry and my chores are finished for the weekend! Good thing too, because it's Sunday and I have to work tomorrow!

It has been a pretty boring, domesticated day. Not too much exciting to report. So here's a poem to finish us off for the day:

The scent of lilac

wafts in

through the window.

Sitting in the middle

of a snuggling sandwich

on my couch,

I can't think of a better way

to spend a Sunday.